Home Sweet Home 🧿

Sup, how have you all been? I'm back to writing blogs after a few months. I stopped writing because I was working hard over the summer and couldn't keep up with everything. I'm still quite busy, which is my excuse for everything lately. But honestly, I am feeling so much emotion together all at once that I'm unable to express it, but I understand it, so it's okay. I haven't been social with my people; lately, I don't watch reels when people send me, and then when they don't for two days, I would be like, oh, why you're not sending them? What's wrong? Which is weird, too. I have stopped talking to a lot of people. I have changed so immensely that sometimes, I'm the shocked one like I did that, woah, but that is okay too. Sometimes I'm glad, like thrilled, but also anxious, feeling about how long the happiness lasts, and then sometimes I'm so sad for no particular reason but just sad. I miss my family a lot. Lately, I keep thinking about them, about how my brother and I used to fight, how I used to hug my mom every time before leaving the house, how I used to be my dad's passenger princess, sometimes having entire conversations till he drops me till classes and sometimes pin drop silence. I was having my dinner last week, and I don't know why, but while eating, I suddenly started crying, cried until I finished my dinner and called my mom. That night, I wrote a poem called Ramen.

"I gaze at my bowl of ramen,
eyes brimming with a hunger that feels almost sacred,
finally granted permission to savor its warmth after so long.

I watch my shoes in the rain,
recalling the joy of dancing beneath silver clouds,
a rare delight I can now indulge in when whimsy strikes.

I stand before the mirror,
wincing from the ache of period cramps,
yet grateful for the soft refuge of family,
where I am treated like a princess, cocooned in care.

I return to my bowl of ramen,
tears brimming as I remember home-cooked comforts,
the love infused in each bite,
the laughter that once filled the air.

Now, I look down at my shoes,
dashing to the closet roof,
escaping the downpour, no longer dancing,
for freedom has replaced the need for permission.

I face my reflection again,
still aching, still alone,
and whisper a quiet apology to myself,
for the days when no one asks if I’m okay,
for the moments when solace feels distant."

I just miss my family so much, and Diwali apart from them was one of the most challenging times cause I miss spending time with my family, I miss lighting firecrackers with my family, I miss meeting my relatives, I miss doing all the things that were chores at one time. And I really wanna hug it out to everyone who has been apart from their loved ones this Diwali. I hope everything you are working on right now will be worthwhile and that you have a very joyous Diwali next year.

Thank you for reading it till the end, Happy New Year. I really hope you are doing great.

From Love.

Charmi

XOXO 🦢